No Eye-Contact Wednesdays

Memo to Employees:

To combat meeting fatigue, we have instituted No Eye-Contact Wednesdays

The problem isn’t the technology; it’s how we use it.

When people complain about remote work, their frustration often masks a deeper truth: they’re not frustrated with the concept of remote work—they’re frustrated with how it’s being executed. Phrases like “Zoom fatigue” or “You can’t collaborate remotely” are often shorthand for, Change is scary, or, My usual way works for me. In effect, we’ve tried nothing and we’re all out of ideas.

Take Zoom fatigue. Many companies respond with “no camera” days. But reframe that to an office setting: Memo to All Employees: To combat meeting fatigue, we have instituted No Eye-Contact Wednesdays. We encourage employees to avoid looking at one another during Wednesday’s meetings.

It’s absurd, yet it’s essentially what companies say with camera-off policies. It ignores the real question: Does this meeting even need to happen?

The problem is rarely the technology; it’s how we choose to use it. To lead effectively in a remote world, we need to stop treating symptoms and start addressing the root causes.

The Power of Face-to-Face

Humans are social creatures. We communicate with more than just words. A raised eyebrow signals doubt. A nod shows engagement. These small, non-verbal cues are processed deep in our limbic system—the ancient part of our brain that once decided whether we should trust the stranger across the watering hole or assume they were going to steal our lunch.

When remote workers say they feel isolated or disconnected, the first question should be: How often are their cameras on? Seeing faces fosters connection, trust, and engagement. Now think about your colleagues who never turn their cameras on. How connected do you feel to them? Do they seem as engaged and present as others?

Yes, there are ASD reasons some individuals prefer verbal or written communications, but that’s the exception, not the rule.

Face-to-face communication, even through a screen, is about more than logistics—it’s about empathy. It’s about building trust. When people declare remote work as the death of collaboration, what they’re really saying is, they don’t know how to build relationships, build trust, build connection, with people if they can’t fall back on the physical. It’s not surprising, therefore, that those same people view remote work as an endless stream of transactional interactions.

Building Trust and Empathy via Remote Work Tools

The magic of trust and empathy is that they aren’t confined to physical proximity—they thrive in the intentional, the thoughtful, and the human. If we reimagine remote work tools not as mere utilities but as extensions of our humanity, we can make screen pixels feel as warm and engaging as a shared coffee break. Here’s how:

1. The Power of the Unexpected Compliment (Peer to Peer)
There’s a simple, almost absurdly effective way to build trust: praise someone unexpectedly. In a remote setting, it’s easy for good work to go unnoticed because there’s no casual “nice job on that presentation” whispered in passing. Enter the asynchronous compliment.

• Action: Call out a colleague’s specific contribution in a public forum like a team channel or group chat.

• Why It Works: Public praise not only boosts the recipient’s morale but also reinforces a culture of recognition for the entire team. It’s like planting a tree in the village square rather than in your backyard—everyone gets to enjoy it.

2. Turn Meetings into “Connection Labs” (Leader to Team)
Remote meetings don’t just have to be about work—they can be about people. A leader who recognizes this can transform a routine meeting into a trust-building exercise.

• Action: Dedicate the first five minutes of your next team meeting to “highs and lows.” Each person shares one highlight and one challenge from their week. This isn’t about prying; it’s about showing up as humans, not avatars. And the leader sets the tone! If you initiate this and then clam up about sharing something real, the team will notice and it’ll backfire.

• Why It Works: Empathy is born in the moments where we see the person behind the role. By making space for personal connection, you create an environment where vulnerability feels safe, and trust naturally follows.

3. Camera-Optional Coffees (Peer to Peer)
In the office, you might bond over a shared love of ‘80s rock or the latest Netflix binge. Remote work makes sharing personal interest easy.

·         Action: Use Slack, Teams, or even a shared playlist on Spotify to exchange your favorite songs, GIFs, or YouTube clips. For example: “Music Mondays” where everyone shares a track they’ve been listening to, or “GIF of the Week” contests where team members submit their best finds.

• Why It Works: Shared interests build rapport. They humanize colleagues and create inside jokes or common ground. A Spotify playlist filled with everyone’s contributions doesn’t just make for great listening—it becomes a tangible symbol of collective personality and team culture.

The Goal

If we accept that trust and empathy are as much about perception as they are about reality, then the goal isn’t to mimic physical interaction—it’s to create experiences that feel just as meaningful. A well-timed emoji, a thoughtful compliment, or a heartfelt personal story shared over a video call can be just as powerful as a handshake or a face-to-face smile.

Remote work isn’t the death of connection. It’s an opportunity to rewrite the script, using tools in ways that amplify the very things that make us human. Because ultimately, trust isn’t built by proximity; it’s built by intention.